Derived from Three Hours of Poetic-Daydream

A Poem is a Lost Glimpse

The fan, our

Rin Gong, whirs endlessly.

I am hidden from eyes here,

outside of the quickly forming chain-webs of

two-way quiet.

Who is painting whom?

-- WE FALL SILENT IN OUR LEAP –

Our sentences come to bear on what we can see as truth. We

plug in words to the places they need to fit

and invent the ones where they

don’t – language to fix

our block-square circle-hole dichotomy.

When truth is too hard to face

we turn to etching out the details –

work in everything that seems to be omnipotent

until you can have the courage to face that

resistance.

-- And it’s interesting that I wrote resistance there,

because I was considering

another word, one which peers in at a world I defy. -

-- WHO NEEDS TO DRAW A FACE WHEN EVERY STRAND OF HAIR IS GLORIOUS –

The only whisper from charcoal is break, break, lose.

There is no medium that can pull us from despair on its

own. Tired and quiet,

we are all muted.

I am not saying “I” right now because “I” don’t exist here,

where there is no one to watch to fix my face forever.

-- SO MUCH LIGHT AND NO ONE KNOWS HOW TO USE IT –

There is mechanical clarity in every erased stretch of face.

Who knows how to do this, really? I keep

writing these questions because it is a resistance for me - even now in this

sentence - to admit that I don’t really know what I’m doing.

-- OBLIVION IS WHAT IS HIDDEN IN THESE FLECKS OF GREY –

You, you’ve made some other girl. You

haven’t painted her. You’ve created some other,

pretty girl, but you haven’t painted her. Perhaps,

though, you’ve painted the way she sees herself.

There is some truth there, not the truth of base vision, you’ve blown right

past that. Instead you have thrown some truth of – damn me if I say it –

spirit.

And when you showed her, she grinned.

-- WHO KNOWS HOW TO DO THIS, REALLY? –

Here is truth in the muted touch of perfect detail.

-- WHO KNOWS HOW TO DO THIS, REALLY? –

Why am I terrified?

-- WHEN YOU SHOWED HER, SHE GRINNED –

Awake. Stay awake. Pay attention to the depth and snap. Pull

cracks from your earth-skin, wrap pens in glue and spit,

place them inside of you.